newborn memories – edited to add pic

For today’s post, I wanted to capture some memories from my first few weeks of being a mom. I didn’t blog much in those early days as I was so overwhemed with learning the ropes (and breastfeeding) but it’s a shame as so much was happening – things I want to remember. Here are some snippets for your pleasure. I’d love to read yours, too, if you’re so inclined 🙂

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Shortly after I woke up in recovery after my c-section, DW arrived with the baby and the nurse asked if I planned to breastfeed. I told her I was and she handed him to me and said, “Okay, here you go.” I just looked at her like WTH do I do now? I did not remember a single thing I had learned in the class and was a total deer in the headlights.

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DW finally went home to shower and catch a short nap. Shortly after she left, the hospital photographer came by to take newborn pics! I knew DW would want to be there so I asked if they could hold off and was told they could for maybe an hour. I called DW and she rushed back to be there. My mom thought I was nuts to hold off for DW, but I knew she’d want to be part of it and guess what? SHE DID! I even brought it up recently and she said of course she wanted to be there.

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When it was time to leave the hospital, it took us FOREVER to get the baby strapped into his carseat. He was just so tiny and floppy and we had never put a newborn into a carseat before. A nurse was hovering and not really helping at all, which just made matters worse. In hindsight, I wish someone had told us to just bring the carseat into the hospital room and do it there. It would have been much less stressful and we’d have had less of an audience.

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The day we got home from the hospital, DW showed me an adorable vintage-style Christmas card that a friend sent to Monkey for his first Christmas. I got teary and went into our bedroom. I laid in the bed and just started crying. The sweetness of the card, the realization that I had a baby and this was his first Christmas, the pain of my incision, the newness of motherhood – it was so overwhelming. DW came in to check on me and saw that I was crying. I told her I was fine and just needed a little time on my own. She left, I had my cry, took a quick nap, and felt much better.

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One day I was nursing the baby in our bedroom for the millionth time that day and I was STARVING. My mom ran out to get us sandwiches and I told DW that when they got there, to bring me one STAT. We have a picture of me nursing the baby in my glider using the My Brest Friend while eating a sandwich. I think my iPhone is stashed in the MBF pocket. Good times 🙂 I’ll have to track that photo down and post it – you’ll get a good laugh! Edited to add hilarious photo:

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My mom stayed with us for three weeks post-birth (my dad was here with her for the first week). I told her specifically when I was pumping in the bedroom not to come in. I was very self-conscious and didn’t want to share the experience. Well, she came busting in one day as I was pumping and I was very exasperated and told her to leave. She left and made a comment to DW about me “freaking out.” Whatevs, Mom, whatevs.

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When I was pumping to get my supply up during that first week or two, my mom would clean all of my pump parts and bottles and have them waiting for me before the next pumping session, including middle of the night ones.

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The first time we went to the lactation consultant (who was AWESOME), tiny Monkey freaked out like crazy. I tried and tried to get him to calm down but had no luck. The second time we visited the LC, I cried when she asked what DW could do to help me be successful with breastfeeding. Poor woman earned her money with us 🙂 To her credit, she said she knew it was a successful session if the mom shed tears.

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When Monkey was a newborn, he would choke in the night (the nurses said that happens frequently with c-section babies – they get amniotic fluid in their lungs or some such thing). It was horrific and scary. I remember being asleep in the hospital with DW asleep in the next bed and Monkey between us. He would start to choke but I couldn’t get to him because of my incision. DW was deeply asleep so I yelled, “DW! DW!” Poor woman would wake with a start and rush for the baby. That terrible choking went on for a week or two and I was afraid every night when we put him down that it would be his last. What an awful feeling that was. The doctors and nurses were all very nonchalant about it, which was also infuriating.

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My mom, DW, and I would take turns sitting with Monkey in the night when he would wake. We had a Boppy set up in the corner of the couch and one of us would sit with him and watch television. One night I noticed my mom seemed really tired, so I told her I’d watch if she wanted to go to sleep. She refused (she loves her Granny time) and I said, “Okay, but do not fall asleep. He can’t sleep in the Boppy without supervision.” She was like, “Mxxx, I will not go to sleep.” When I came out later to check on them, guess who was asleep? It’s kind of funny now, but I was so angry at the time.

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I’m sure there are more things I’m forgetting, but this gives a pretty good idea of how insane life is with a newborn I think.